My world may be literally ending in a few days. Guess who's going to be on the front lines! Hint: She knows how to text. But I have time to talk if you can.
She'd told Atton not to use the nickname anymore. But what did it matter now? It wasn't like she could do anything to him now.
"I just wanted to say I'm sorry for putting your life in danger," he said. "Sorry for wandering in here in the first place. I shouldn't have come to the island-- I shouldn't have been able to. Ten years I've been wandering and I shouldn't have; I should've stuck to my ship the way the others did, instead of running away. I should've..."
A brief silence.
"I still have tens of thousands of people screaming in my head," Atton said. "When everyone died on Malachor V-- I could hear it, and it's this echo I can't let go of. Of course it followed me to the island. It follows me everywhere."
Another pause.
"I'm sorry, Si," he said. "I'm going back to Malachor V-- back to where the echo started-- so, I guess that's an apology on maybe missing out on future get-drunk-and-make-good dates, too."
"Hey, Sia." Atton's voice was extremely casual; he was thanking the comm system for making it somewhat unclear how hard he was working to keep it that way. "I'm coming back to the island soon. I'll be staying a while."
A short pause.
"I just thought you'd like to know. So you can avoid me. Or not."
My world is being eaten by a force of nature from the dawn of another universe. On island doing research with maybe evil bird. Don't have time to visit, but thinking of you. Have a good night!
"I really, really, really hope that was a wrong number, but just in case it wasn't, I wanted to let you know that I'm totally flattered and I think you're amazing, but--- no, wait a minute. Why is 'horse' some kind of hard line for me? Just 'cause I grew up on a farm? I need call you back after I've thought about this.
{long, long pause}
...Why do I live someplace that makes me need to think about this?"
When Sia got to her phone, she stared at those messages for a while. She figured he had to be drunk, but in all the time she'd known him she didn't remember ever seeing him like this. She also had no idea how well logic was going to factor in here.
Eventually she came up with, I'd never replace you.
u know he was afraid tell me he didn't like me going off Jediing all the time? s what H came to shake me up for. like i wouldnt have done anything for that kid
heading back to Fandom to teach for the summer, he commed. just fyi.
One day he’d admit that getting him a therapist had been a fantastic idea on her part. Today… well, the message sort of swerved in that general direction, didn’t it?
I reserve the right to run screaming back to Coruscant if it turns out Skywalker’s taken over while I was gone, Atton sent back, which was a ‚yes, I will’, if you spoke Atton.
"Hey, Si.” The voice message came from an unknown number, the wind roaring loudly in the background. Hopefully she’d recognize Atton’s voice, though. "I had Mical over for the weekend. We had some long talks. I, uh, told him I don’t plan on coming back to my version of home any time soon.”
A pause. "And that’s why I’m calling. My head’s been a lot more clear since I came here and stopped running missions at all. So I’m thinking at the end of this semester, or maybe next semester, I’m just going to… go and see what happens if I go to Earth full-time and bury my comm at the back of the closet.”
"I know it scared you when I said something like that years ago, but I promise, this is different. In some ways it might be the opposite of disappearing. But anyway, I don’t want to lose you. I know I was– really hard to care about for a long while there, and you deserved better, but obviously I can’t go back and change that. So I’m trying to do it right, this time. Am I rambling? I think I’m rambling.”
"Anyway, I just bought this phone, for whenever I decide to do the thing. I’m putting your number in it, and Portalocity’s. And now you have the number, too. I want you to know you can call me any time, stop by any time, all right? And I mean any time. If you’ve had a terrible week Empressing, call me, swing by, I’ll make you cocktails and drag you around and force you to develop some hobbies and interests or– whatever you need.”
He took a breath.
"I care about you too,” he said. "I don’t uh, I never really say that. But just so you know.”
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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My world may be literally ending in a few days. Guess who's going to be on the front lines! Hint: She knows how to text. But I have time to talk if you can.
Crazy Phones!
"...Sorry, what? Did he dump your ass or something? Are you that hard up for it? Never gonna happen, kid."
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Firing you as my friend. Next time I'm knocking you out and dragging you away from the bar.
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There was a tattoo, Jessica. A tattoo.
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Your grandpa's in town this weekend. Dinner?
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Because Sia could tell the pollen thing was still going on and nope. Nope nope nope.
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I'm back. It went well. Nothing unexpected.
[Voicemail]
She'd told Atton not to use the nickname anymore. But what did it matter now? It wasn't like she could do anything to him now.
"I just wanted to say I'm sorry for putting your life in danger," he said. "Sorry for wandering in here in the first place. I shouldn't have come to the island-- I shouldn't have been able to. Ten years I've been wandering and I shouldn't have; I should've stuck to my ship the way the others did, instead of running away. I should've..."
A brief silence.
"I still have tens of thousands of people screaming in my head," Atton said. "When everyone died on Malachor V-- I could hear it, and it's this echo I can't let go of. Of course it followed me to the island. It follows me everywhere."
Another pause.
"I'm sorry, Si," he said. "I'm going back to Malachor V-- back to where the echo started-- so, I guess that's an apology on maybe missing out on future get-drunk-and-make-good dates, too."
"Good luck," he said.
The voicemail ended abruptly.
[Voicemail]
A short pause.
"I just thought you'd like to know. So you can avoid me. Or not."
Click.
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My world is being eaten by a force of nature from the dawn of another universe. On island doing research with maybe evil bird. Don't have time to visit, but thinking of you. Have a good night!
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World mostly saved. New Jersey basically gone. Working relief for near future, won't have time to talk.
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Wrong number!
Re: Wrong number!
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"I really, really, really hope that was a wrong number, but just in case it wasn't, I wanted to let you know that I'm totally flattered and I think you're amazing, but--- no, wait a minute. Why is 'horse' some kind of hard line for me? Just 'cause I grew up on a farm? I need call you back after I've thought about this.
{long, long pause}
...Why do I live someplace that makes me need to think about this?"
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"Almost-- outta he-- bzzzt--"
A long, weird pause with sounds of battle in the background.
"--hope you got-- a medbed handy-- on my way--"
End message.
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yo know im gonna dissapoint u too rite
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im gonna kark up and ull run off and get urself killed bc im useless
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i deserve to get replaced right? ud know ur a karkin princess how did i slep with a karkin princess how am i friends with a karkin princess im nothin
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Eventually she came up with, I'd never replace you.
That kind of went for a lot of things.
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If he'd been any less drunk, he wouldn't have sent the resulting, promise?
But he wasn't, so he sent it.
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I promise.
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He meant that.
He was going to be terribly embarrassed in the morning.
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I think that's for me to decide, really.
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What makes you think I'm joking?
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Atton hated being drunk, but he was, in fact, drunk, and not particularly great at being coherent.
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It was a scary question to ask, but she might get an honest answer.
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He was definitely going to regret this in the morning.
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Right? Right.
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That'd been true for months.
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That explained some things.
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Especially when he'd been around so little, from what she knew.
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She'd said similar earlier about herself, after all.
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Yeah.
Definitely.
heading back to Fandom to teach for the summer, he commed. just fyi.
One day he’d admit that getting him a therapist had been a fantastic idea on her part. Today… well, the message sort of swerved in that general direction, didn’t it?
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That could be a good move for you. You'll have to let me know how it's going.
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A pause. "And that’s why I’m calling. My head’s been a lot more clear since I came here and stopped running missions at all. So I’m thinking at the end of this semester, or maybe next semester, I’m just going to… go and see what happens if I go to Earth full-time and bury my comm at the back of the closet.”
"I know it scared you when I said something like that years ago, but I promise, this is different. In some ways it might be the opposite of disappearing. But anyway, I don’t want to lose you. I know I was– really hard to care about for a long while there, and you deserved better, but obviously I can’t go back and change that. So I’m trying to do it right, this time. Am I rambling? I think I’m rambling.”
"Anyway, I just bought this phone, for whenever I decide to do the thing. I’m putting your number in it, and Portalocity’s. And now you have the number, too. I want you to know you can call me any time, stop by any time, all right? And I mean any time. If you’ve had a terrible week Empressing, call me, swing by, I’ll make you cocktails and drag you around and force you to develop some hobbies and interests or– whatever you need.”
He took a breath.
"I care about you too,” he said. "I don’t uh, I never really say that. But just so you know.”
Click.